Bad Writing

Proof that someone out there has even less talent at writing then I do:

“As he stared at her ample bosom, he daydreamed of the dual Stromberg carburetors in his vintage Triumph Spitfire,” he wrote, comparing a woman’s breasts to “small knurled caps of the oil dampeners.”

That lovely excerpt comes from this years Worst Writer Winner. The full article from CNN is here. It goes on to mention some of the ‘honorable’ mentions like

India “hangs like a wet washcloth from the towel rack of Asia.”

I realize that I will probably never win a Pulitzer prize for anything I write (especially here, where I write more like I talk) But even I would never have considered have a character compare breasts to a carburetor! I mean.. would I compare breasts to fruit? Sure..that gives a good size reference? But a carb? that’d be like comparing breasts to the G5 chip in my iMac!

Hmm….. “Her breasts where as hot and advanced as a G5”

Naah…. doesn’t quite do it for me…